Blessed. Graced to Participate in #NCTEAR19 and To Be Part of the Dr. Tonya Perry Vision. Few Words. Much Reflection

“And O my people, out yonder, hear me, they do not love your neck unnoosed and straight. So love your neck; put a hand on it, grace it, stroke it and hold it up. and all your inside parts that they'd just as soon slop for hogs, you got to love them. The dark, dark liver--love it, love it and the beat and beating heart, love that too. More than eyes or feet. More than lungs that have yet to draw free air. More than your life-holding womb and your life-giving private parts, hear me now, love your heart. For this is the prize.” --  Nobel laureate author Toni Morrison at the National Memorial for Peace and Justice in Montgomery, Alabama.

Yesterday, before the conference officially kicked off, presenters had the opportunity to work with high school students at Sidney Lanier High School in the Black belt of Montgomery, Alabama, while celebrating education, promoting individual excellence and discussing dreams. The young people were focused, attentive, engaged and ready to learn (as they usually are). Following the community work, however, we visited The National Memorial for Peace and Justice and The Legacy Museum, two locations dedicated to the history of slavery, the injustices that followed, and the anti-Black traditions that continue into the 21st century through schooling, policies, and our failures to face the ugliness of slavery head-on. To walk through these spaces, to feel the history, and acknowledge it in documentaries, photo-journalism, news reports, and statistics was a lot to process in one day - especially in relation to the uplifting and hopeful youth work of the morning.

Yet, similar to visits to the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum - which changed my teaching early in my career - I walked through in silence, in disgust, in frustration, in fear, in sadness, and with disbelief.

Lest we forget, it was real. History is always real. History is today. It is our children. It is our schools. It is the suffering of so many - the harshness, cruelty, hatred and intention - that should never be forgotten.

Ah, but how soon we forget.

My blog is not a location for me to process everything that went through my mind as I experienced the museums and school visit. If I wrote everyday for the rest of my life, I'm unsure I could capture it all - the lynchings, the intentional political making, the exploitation, and the physical abuse of one race for the benefit, economics, and ease of another.

I can only shake my head.

Today, we present on work we did in Connecticut last summer, and I'm thankful to have opportunity to share the work, but I already know that I will leave this conference holding the impact of the Sidney Lanier youth, the tribute of The National Memorial for Peace and Justice, and the reporting of the The Legacy Museum as the power of this conference (art, documentation, tribute and reminder that every privilege I have today arrived from histories that have fostered and benefited from hatred and exploitation.

I fear the worst of humanity, and I prefer to choose love to guide my path. Yet, I'm afraid, if you don't look hatred directly in the eye and confront it, history will show its uglier side once again.

Love the heart. Love the beauty in others. Just love.